Lost in a city (dream)

The dreams keep coming, incredibly vivid and intense lately.

I was at work at my current job when I got a notice that I had to fly out for training on quick notice. Not a huge deal, while I hate this I have done it before. I was in a large east coast city, although I think even in the dream I wasn’t sure which one.

I arrived at the work site the day before training, and one of the regular instructors informed me I would have to catch a bus to the training site the next day. Unlike our regular training where bussing is provided, it would have to be a public transit bus. I am fairly sure he told me where to go, but even in the dream I couldn’t tell you exactly where. All I knew was the city was huge.

So the rest of my coworkers scattered (we had evidently met at some public area, I think a bus station). I knew I had to get to the area that evening so I could crash in a hotel room first. I wandered across the street and around a bit but couldn’t find a single bus stop anywhere. I knew they should be right there.

I then walked down and into a little shop, with three younger ladies and asked them. They pointed out and indicated if I go across the street and down about half a block the bus would be right there. I thanked them for everything, turned around and left their shop, only to find I wasn’t in the same area, and there were no bus stops and no real roads, more like some weird area with lots of buildings, but once again no roads.

I turned around to go back in and ask when I found that their shop was gone as well. I was a little worried so I just walked in a straight line, figuring I am in a city, I will come across a road fairly soon through the buildings. That is when I end up on what appeared to be a single road, with woods on the other side. Then the sudden worry I was going to end up in Baltimore.

I have no idea where the city of Baltimore came from, but I woke up disorientated and lost feeling.

I suspect a lot of this has to do with the fact I had an impromptu training scheduled this week, where I got pushed hard to go to St. Louis. I was able to avoid that due to my broken foot, but it was half assed organization and I still have to grudgingly call in for useless training that won’t help for most of the week.

Time is flying by

I can’t believe it is already April (and halfway through that). It really only seems like October was just a couple of weeks ago (especially with the current weather). I even have put off running my hubby’s second game (Cthulhu-like) since November thinking I wanted to update it, but now its almost six months with it not being done. I need to fix that.

I guess a lot has happened though. We have had a surgery for Wolsey, along with a lot of healing. My foot has been broken for six months now, and our job is this endless purgatory that time doesn’t really seem to intersect with.

The good thing is a month ago the hubby got a state job, and is out of the purgatory/hell of the Defense Department. I am aiming to follow him out of the DoD as soon as possible. My first problem is my broken foot. I don’t dare leave until it is fixed, since it happened on the job and getting the feds to respond to anything from an ex-employee is impossible.

There are a couple other things that are holding me here for a couple months at least, mostly money and our lease. That combined with some things I haven’t talked about yet (but probably will in next few months) will signify a GIGANTIC change in my life, probably the second biggest event other then marrying the hubby. Definitely not a bad decision (actually its a very good decision I should have made decades ago), but it comes with a lot of stress and uncertainty.

I daresay I will sit down to talk about it in the next few months and be blown away by how quick the time keeps going by and all the changes. I guess that is life though, especially the older you get, the less a week or a month seem in comparison to your past experiences.

Here is to enjoying your time though! I plan on doing that.

Supernatural attack at work (dream)

I had a remarkably calm yet very clear dream last night.

I was at work (current DoD job) with my hubby and what seemed to be the entirety of all five offices in the area. We were in some sort of stadium seating conference room with the normal talking going on.

Hubby looked up and asked me if I heard it. I stopped and listened (which is funny if you know me, I have partial hearing loss) and something was going on. Both of us got up and started telling people to follow us outside. We went out the emergency exit and then it was an outside stairway going down what seemed like several stories.

We were halfway down and we knew there was some sort of attacker up there. It wasn’t a human with a gun, I keep thinking it was something big and nasty with pointy bits. However our coworkers are idiots. They kept going back up, there were donuts and they didn’t want to do any leave without pay by missing the conference (LWOP). The final argument most of them used was they wanted the promotion to Grade 13 and if the CAD director saw them gone they wouldn’t get it.

Eventually it was just me, hubby and a couple of the less idiotic people let outside at the bottom. We watched as everyone kept going back up and into the door a few floors above. Every time someone opened the door we would hear screaming and the sound of fighting, but they would still go inside.

The funny part was, I woke up and I wasn’t scared, or worried. I just kept thinking what a bunch of idiots. I think that pretty much sums up my feelings about that for most of my coworkers.


A lot of people don’t understand why I am not satisfied with my current employment. I get paid more than I probably ever will again, for a job that is much easier than any job I will have in the future. I have many reasons I am not satisfied, one of the reasons for my dislike is the travel.

I realize it is normal for a lot of couples to spend time away from each other. I hear from some people “that’s healthy”, but not for me. Before this job, over 22 years of marriage I had only been away from my husband for maybe three days at most. Since I started my job in 2014 however I have spent 4+ weeks a year away from him, the pay, the ease of job isn’t worth it to me.

It is probably partially because my parents didn’t spend time away from each other. The only time they did was when it was forced by outside forces (primarily if my dad had to do any time in jail). Other than that, in their entire 46-year marriage they never spent a day away from each other.

I hate being away from him, I would rather work in fast food, living paycheck to paycheck then to spend a night from him. Eventually I will be in a position to change this situation. I won’t wait for some “future date” when all my student loans will be paid off, it will be sooner than later, much sooner.

However, for now at least I have to take a flight this morning to Atlanta where I will stay for five days (one weekend day and four weekdays). I will just be counting down the hours until I can come home to him.

Just an update

Well here I am, 2am and awake. I have been fortunate though, lately my insomnia hasn’t been waking me up this early (yesterday I slept until 5:15am which is unheard of) so it is probably a little expected I get some today.

Things are going really well honestly. In gaming I had the most productive group game in years (see the game at https://silkandspices.wordpress.com). We have three new players joining my hubby and Torie. It was a character making session with a bit of role-play, but even so I got more feedback and more submissions from my three new players in one game then I got in years from some of my older players. It felt really nice to be appreciated.

Work is still just work. My hubby might have some good news coming up, we will see. I am very proud of him no matter what. As for my work it is a train wreck (yes we work at the same place). I am watching an audit we are doing just starting to nose dive, although I don’t feel too bad because I have told management repeatedly what the problem is and they don’t want to pursue it, so it isn’t my problem.

I am getting my arm sleeve tattoo worked on, its starting to look really nice. The hubby got his done so he is good to go for now, I still have a few more sessions. This time though I think I am going to go a little slower, only a couple of hours at a time. It is cheaper in the short term, and honestly I just don’t want to sit under the tattoo gun for more then a couple hours at a time.

Brandon put a background around my poor lonely angel.

Personally I am doing ok. Hubby’s surgeries are over and he is recovering so that is a relief. I am starting to work on my own health but that is a bit problematic. Evidently my foot is still fractured and it is officially a Jones Break. Means it may not heal on its own. It has been since October 3, 2017 when I broke it originally, we are going to give it until the end of March and see the orthopedic surgeon again. A boot or cast won’t help so I just have to take it easy.

More health news, I am halfway done with my first crown this year, they have to put the new crown in next week. Then I have a second crown and a bridge to get, with a final touch up of fixing a cracked tooth. Also today I will be going in to have my hearing checked along with the holes in my eardrums (I had tubes put in about 7 months ago, my hearing still sucks) and we will see how that goes.

Finally I am getting a CAT scan for the hernia/stomach problems. Been trying to get that for more then two years. Overall this year is about getting my health back in shape, that way if our job situation changes I can move on healthier.

My anxiety is also doing ok. Obviously I am still suffering from insomnia, but it isn’t as hard as it was last year at this time. the post-holidays (actually pre-holidays as well) is always  more difficult and my dad passing’s anniversary is pretty soon. All that being said though the hubby’s health has improved as has my anxiety because of it.

The rest of life is a bit slow and steady. I am reading (or listening to audiobooks) a lot, working on gaming stuff and just enjoying being with my husband. Oh and realizing how old I am getting when half my post is health issues. Is this what my future holds? LOL.


Certification Alphabet Soup

My actual profession is an auditor. Right now I audit large defense contractors for the D0D. Before that I audited state and local governmental agencies, employers who are “underground” (meaning they are working off the books) and was a senior accounting analyst for a large county.

None of these jobs ever require certification. Many of the jobs require years of experience, but getting an actual accounting certification isn’t necessary and I have never seen where it actually means that person is more capable then someone without a certification.

However, that being said it sometimes looks better to have certifications, even if they don’t actually mean you are skilled enough or even smart enough to do the job. So I have been looking over my CPA study materials, trying to figure out if I want to go this direction, or get a CIA (Certified Internal Auditor) and CFE (Certified Fraud Examiner). The CPA is a lot of study, a lot of tests and can take up to 18 months. The CFE and CIA could both be taken in that time, with a lot of time to spare.

CPA has most flexible overall (but I don’t plan on ever working for a CPA firm where its the most use) but this is a better $$ option. Most people when they hear the title CPA they have an idea that you are smart, can do anything for them accounting wise, etc. The fact is I can do that right now professionally without the certification and would charge a lot less is a pretty funny side note.

However, I don’t like the environment of most accounting firms, or other employers that look for CPAs. It pays really really well, but its like this little slice of hell. Filled with more politics and bootlicking then actually doing your job. Also it is mostly cubicle work. I hate both of those things, and I have Oppositional Defiance Disorder, meaning I don’t respond well to authority like figures. However, I will admit that I do like the flexibility in where I can work and the money. That wars with the fact that I hate routine, I dislike having to sit beside most people for long periods (my husband is the single exception to this rule), and I get bored with accounting in general.

On the other hand the CFE is part of what I love doing (auditing) but a lot more niche. It is a lot more interesting. I don’t like the day to day minutia of accounting, the cycles and the getting into the deep details. I prefer digging into accounting, finding if there are problems and basically telling people where they are wrong.

Auditing relies on a person being able to be assertive, able to handle people hating them, being quick on your feet, and most importantly flexible. I am not assertive in most parts of my life, but auditing is a definite exception. In addition I need to have things happening quickly, and I love being flexible. Most importantly I have no problem with conflict, which is a lot of auditing. People push back, yell at you, throw cans of pop at you or threaten you with a pistol (I have had those all happen to me).

That means the CFE is awesome. It just reinforces my credentials in auditing and would expose me to more jobs that are in that direction. The problem is like I said earlier, a lot more niche. Then again my whole professional history is pretty niche (and I do get head hunters after me several times a year for that niche). However, it is still limiting to where I can go and who I can work for.

Since Auditing is what I like, the CIA I will get eventually no matter what so that is just a matter of putting it in order. It will add to my credentials no matter what I do and it is fairly straight forward.

I guess the hard part for considering the CPA for me is I have audited dozens of CPAs and they are absolutely no smarter or more knowledgeable then accountants without that classification. Its purely to charge your customer more. When I was in school and asked why the “5th year rule” was enforced, the idea that a CPA needs a 5th year of college, and my teacher who helped with the CPA test design was specific and said it was to limit the pool of CPA candidates so they could charge more.

I wasn’t really shocked by that, but it really goes at the heart of my experience with the CPA. Of course there are exceptions, but the general rule that has been backed up by ten years of auditing CPAs fits right in there. I do have to say that they get really uppity when a non-CPA audits them, nails them and they get caught being wrong (sometimes doing it on purpose, sometimes they are idiots).

I will play around with the CPA study materials, but the 600+ hours of study needed to take it might be beyond what I want to do. I guess I will just talk to the hubby and get feedback.